A very touching story about marriage:

When I got home that night as my wife served dinner, I held her hand and said, I've got something to tell you. She sat down and ate quietly. Again I observed the hurt in her eyes.

Suddenly I didn't know how to open my mouth. But I had to let her know what I was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised the topic calmly.

She didn't seem to be annoyed by my words, instead she asked me softly, why?

I avoided her question. This made her angry. She threw away the chopsticks and shouted at me, you are not a man! That night, we didn't talk to each other. She was weeping. I knew she wanted to find out what had happened to our marriage. But I could hardly give her a satisfactory answer; she had lost my heart to Jane. I didn't love her anymore. I just pitied her!

With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a divorce agreement which stated that she could own our house, our car, and 30% stake of my company.

She glanced at it and then tore it into pieces. The woman who had spent ten years of her life with me had become a stranger. I felt sorry for her wasted time, resources and energy but I could not take back what I had said for I loved Jane so dearly. Finally she cried loudly in front of me, which was what I had expected to see. To me her cry was actually a kind of release. The idea of divorce which had obsessed me for several weeks seemed to be firmer and clearer now.

The next day, I came back home very late and found her writing something at the table. I didn't have supper but went straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast because I was tired after an eventful day with Jane.

When I woke up, she was still there at the table writing. I just did not care so I turned over and was asleep again.

In the morning she presented her divorce conditions: she didn't want anything from me, but needed a month's notice before the divorce. She requested that in that one month we both struggle to live as normal a life as possible. Her reasons were simple: our son had his exams in a month's time and she didn't want to disrupt him with our broken marriage.

This was agreeable to me. But she had something more, she asked me to recall how I had carried her into out bridal room on our wedding day.

She requested that every day for the month's duration I carry her out of our bedroom to the front door ever morning. I thought she was going crazy. Just to make our last days together bearable I accepted her odd request.

I told Jane about my wife's divorce conditions. . She laughed loudly and thought it was absurd. No matter what tricks she applies, she has to face the divorce, she said scornfully.

My wife and I hadn't had any body contact since my divorce intention was explicitly expressed. So when I carried her out on the first day, we both appeared clumsy. Our son clapped behind us, daddy is holding mommy in his arms. His words brought me a sense of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting room, then to the door, I walked over ten meters with her in my arms. She closed her eyes and said softly; don't tell our son about the divorce. I nodded, feeling somewhat upset. I put her down outside the door. She went to wait for the bus to work. I drove alone to the office.

On the second day, both of us acted much more easily. She leaned on my chest. I could smell the fragrance of her blouse. I realized that I hadn't looked at this woman carefully for a long time. I realized she was not young any more. There were fine wrinkles on her face, her hair was graying! Our marriage had taken its toll on her. For a minute I wondered what I had done to her.

On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I felt a sense of intimacy returning. This was the woman who had given ten years of her life to me.

On the fifth and sixth day, I realized that our sense of intimacy was growing again. I didn't tell Jane about this. It became easier to carry her as the month slipped by. Perhaps the everyday workout made me stronger.

She was choosing what to wear one morning. She tried on quite a few dresses but could not find a suitable one. Then she sighed, all my dresses have grown bigger. I suddenly realized that she had grown so thin, that was the reason why I could carry her more easily.

Suddenly it hit me... she had buried so much pain and bitterness in her heart. Subconsciously I reached out and touched her head.

Our son came in at the moment and said, Dad, it's time to carry mom out. To him, seeing his father carrying his mother out had become an essential part of his life. My wife gestured to our son to come closer and hugged him tightly. I turned my face away because I was afraid I might change my mind at this last minute. I then held her in my arms, walking from the bedroom, through the sitting room, to the hallway. Her hand surrounded my neck softly and naturally. I held her body tightly; it was just like our wedding day.

But her much lighter weight made me sad. On the last day, when I held her in my arms I could hardly move a step. Our son had gone to school. I held her tightly and said, I hadn't noticed that our life lacked intimacy.

I drove to office.... jumped out of the car swiftly without locking the door. I was afraid any delay would make me change my mind...I walked upstairs. Jane opened the door and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not want the divorce anymore.

She looked at me, astonished, and then touched my forehead. Do you have a fever? She said. I moved her hand off my head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won't divorce. My marriage life was boring probably because she and I didn't value the details of our lives, not because we didn't love each other anymore. Now I realize that since I carried her into my home on our wedding day I am supposed to hold her until death do us apart.

Jane seemed to suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud slap and then slammed the door and burst into tears. I walked downstairs and drove away.

At the floral shop on the way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I'll carry you out every morning until death do us apart.

That evening I arrived home, flowers in my hands, a smile on my face, I run up stairs, only to find my wife in the bed - dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER for months and I was so busy with Jane to even notice. She knew that she would die soon and she wanted to save me from the whatever negative reaction from our son, in case we push thru with the divorce.-- At least, in the eyes of our son--- I'm a loving husband....

The small details of your lives are what really matter in a relationship. It is not the mansion, the car, property, the money in the bank. These create an environment conducive for happiness but cannot give happiness in themselves. So find time to be your spouse's friend and do those little things for each other that build intimacy. Do have a real happy marriage! 

masing2 lapar tunggu makanan!

there is a certain incident that happened in our class today. today we are supposed to pass up our summary assignment but somehow, Dato' forget about it. at the end of the lesson, he left the class without asking for it. so one of my friend reminded him about the assignment.

guess what happen afterwards? those who did not completed the assignment started to criticize him upon seeing his action in reminding Dato' regarding our assignment. Dato' gave us the assignment two weeks ago. so basically there is no excuse at all if we did not finish it on time.

it did not stop there..at the library, one of them even have the guts to openly criticized him, yet again. what kind of attitude is that? my point is, my friend here are innocent. in fact, he did the right thing! those who criticized him are a bunch of dumb ass. seriously. why the heck they are trying to blame someone else when the fault lies within themselves? go blame yourself! if someone else can finish it on time, why can't you? what they did is really stupid.

if you guys read my blog, you know who-you-are. seeing that kind of attitude made me sick. you guys are pathetic!

skrg ni mmg tgh addicted dgn game ni. game ape? FrontierVille!!! serious game ni best. tgk gambar beruang tuh pon dah rase attracted nak cube main. XD

sekali bile dah cube, waaa teros addicted! baru je start main awal julai harituh. game ni senang je, kite kena jd farmer. so kne la tanam segale jenis buah & sayuran sambil complete kan quest2 yang ada. pastuh kite boleh decorate kite nye farm. mmg menarik!

sape yg tak cube lagi, boley la cube main. but don't blame me if you get addicted like i did =p ..kat bawah ni pix of my farm. heheh. decoration ala kadar je, xde mase nak hias cantik2. LOL

FYI, i've completed all the quest. huhu. baru je abiskan quest peanut td! phewww. now am waiting for Zynga to introduce a new quest. wondering when that's gonna happen. hmm

p/s: for beginners, don't be shy to ask for tips from me. i can guide you. XD

salam & good evening!

tinggal lagi 2 jam je lagi kita semua bakal menyambut hari kemerdekaan yg ke-53. time flies so fast ehhh. sekejap je rase.

let me be among the earliest to wish you HAPPY MERDEKA DAY!! semoga Allah sentiasa memberkati negara Malaysia khususnya umat2 Islam di negara ini. ambil yg jernih, buang yang keroh. sama2 la kita renung2 kan balik pada masa silam. we're damn lucky to be borned in this country.

pada para remaja di luar sane, sambut la merdeka dgn berpada-pada. elakkan la dari pergi tempat2 yg tak sepatotnya ehhh. *go figure*

come sing along with me. haha =p

MERDEKA!!! MERDEKA!!! MERDEKA!!!

-out-

salam & good morning world!

i'm suffering from a flue right now. *non-stop sneezing* . it happened since yesterday, but i didn't take any meds, so naturally its getting worse. blimey! i hate taking the flu meds because of the side effect. a big NOOOOO! i rather had the flu rather than facing the side effect! *yes, to that extend!*
nevertheless, everything else seems fine. like i said in my previous post, the 1st wave is over-end-period. a big relieved there. braving myself for the 2nd wave right after raye. LOL

this week, i got two official offers from the bank. one from Bank Rakyat and the other one from CIMB. but after considering the pros and cons of both offers, i've chosen Bank Rakyat. talking about their allowance, its really little. some of my friends said:

friend A: sikit nye, mcm x berbaloi je.
friend B: sikit la, ko tau kan KFH nye berkali gande lg tinggi.

well my dear friends, all i can say is, i've made my decisions based on long term benefits, not short term. as a wise student, we must plan for our future progress, not short term progress. =p

i also heard that the possibility of Bank Rakyat to offer their practical trainee a place in their organization is quite high. i'm hoping that i'll be one of the few lucky person *insya-Allah*. you just imagine how much bonuses they're giving away to their employees each year. *drooling* haha

just like the saying of one of my favorite quote:

" jodoh pertemuan ,rezeki dan ajal maut Allah yg tentukan"

so as His servant, we must strive our best in all our doings. now, i better start reading the book Dato' told us to read and write the summary. otherwise, something realllyyyyyyyy bad is going to happen. LOL

see ya around!

Sepatotnye, skrg ni dah bley blk rumah. hari ni cuti, Nuzul Quran. ikotkan, lepas claz semalam dah bley troz blk. Tp nk wat cmner, ade test hari sabtu ni.iskkkk. Since next tuesday pon cuti & hari isnin pon ade 1 claz je, alang2 la kannn..baik extend je cuti tuh. hahaha

what a hectic week!!

nevertheless, i am done with two tests and one major presentation. verdict? hmmmm. regarding the tests, all i can say is *i've tried my best!!*. the questions are tough. no doubt bout' that.

i was quite nervous before the presentation. to make things worse, two of our group members are M.I.A. *time wat keje nak xnak, pastu present x dtg! elok la sgt tuh!!* . i had to present regarding the calculations of the warrants, using a lot illustrations, i somehow managed to make the audiences understand what the heck i am babbling in front. LOL. even the lecturer did not ask much questions about it. *lega2*

due to our two M.I.A members, i had no choice but to also present their slide, *differences between Islamic and conventional call warrant *..spontaneous. T__T! just by using logic + the general knowledge that i possessed. alhamdulillah, it went well. my group presentation ended with a loud applause from the floor + "very good" remarks from the lecturer. wh00t whoot!

now, comin' up is two more tests and a presentation.

going to bed now, tomorrow am going for shopping. raye kan dah nak dekat. haha XD

-out-

teroverslept pulak tadi T__T..now i only have 6 hours before the test starts & i haven't cover a single chapter, nil, zero, nothin'! 5 chaps in 6 hours? you gotta say "i'm lovin' it!!!"

just got a call from the BANK this morning. *excited* haha. well, i'm still not sure whether i got it or not, but they asked me to fax my IC as well as the confirmation later from UiTM. gonna settle this matter with them tomorrow ASAP. i would say as for now, the chance is 50-50.

i'm so freakingright now.

Been so long since i last visited my own blog. *LMAO*